Silouette of the nifty woman dancing at the sea during sunset. Natural light and darkness. Artistic colors added
There is no doubt that we are creatures of habit. You and I probably have hundreds of habits, many of which we don’t even realize we have. We just take them for granted. They are “just the way we do things”. But some of those habits gradually and some, not so gradually, chip away at our self-confidence. It can be such a gradual process that you probably don’t even notice that it’s happening. Sometimes it can be so gradual that you don’t even know that it’s happening.
But, the habit I’m going to address now is so powerful, that if you stop doing it today, you will instantly feel a boost in your confidence.
That habit is not keeping your commitments to yourself.
How many times have you made a commitment to begin exercising 3 times per week only to stop after just a few walks or exercise classes? Or maybe you committed to stop drinking so many coffees from Starbucks only to fall off of the wagon the first day or when you felt sad or stressed? Or maybe you’ve broken even bigger commitments to yourself about spending or saving money. It doesn’t matter how big or small you may deem the commitments they have the same effect on your self-confidence.
When you don’t follow through on the commitments that you make to yourself you send a message to subconscious mind that you do not matter. If you were to think about it you would probably realize that you are diligent about keeping your commitments to other people because you don’t want to disappoint them. But, each time you don’t follow through on your word to yourself you disappoint yourself and with each disappointment you trust yourself less and less. If you don’t trust yourself to follow through your confidence in your ability to grow and expand is destroyed.
Your greatest power is your power to choose. Once you make a commitment to yourself you must use your power of choice to follow through with it every time, even if you don’t feel like it. Every time you do your confidence blossoms.
Begin today by making small promises to yourself. Even something like making the bed every day or walking around the block. You can make it simple and build up as you practice and become more confident.
When I started my kick boxing classes in October, I hadn’t been doing any real exercise for some time. When I signed up I made a commitment to the gym for one year. I committed to myself that I would take a class at least 3 times per week. In the beginning when I was waking up an hour earlier I would lay in bed trying to wake up thinking of all of the reasons NOT to go…it was cold outside, the classed were too hard, etc. But most weeks I got there all three times. The days I didn’t go, I beat myself up all day, knowing that I had missed my opportunity.
Eventually when I tried to talk myself out of going I would asked myself “what will the result be if I don’t go?” My answer: I would feel guilty and regretful. My next question: “what will the result be if I do go?” my answer: more energy, I will feel great emotionally, physically and mentally.
Today, four months later, I don’t need to ask myself those questions. There is no longer any morning dialogue. I just get up and go. The best part is that I know that I can make a commitment to myself and keep it…even when I don’t feel like it. As a result, I treat myself as though I matter as much as everyone else. I also know that in the future when I decide to do something I trust myself to do it. This is a very important step to loving yourself.
Work with me! Don't let another day go by creating a less than desirable life. You deserve your hearts desires!